Hey there. And welcome to Nothing but the Words. I’m your author coach, Candice L Davis.

Last week, I had the honor and privilege of speaking at Beach Camp. I spoke about how to jump-start your business-building book. I was just one of about a dozen female entrepreneurs who spoke on a wide variety of subjects. You can grab a copy of the recording at beachpreneurs.com for super-low prince.

Let’s dive into writing your own story. Obviously, if you’re writing a memoir, you’re going to be telling your own story. But if you write a how-to book or any other kind of nonfiction that positions you as an expert or authority, you’ll need to tell your story. 

So let’s look at some of the common pitfalls in writing your story. These mistakes can ruin the effectiveness of your story, but they’re all simple to avoid when you know how.

Pitfall #1 Making it all about you. 🡪 Share your insights so your reader can get some value. One of my coaching clients looked at her first draft of her memoir and freaked out because it was so much I and me. She felt like it came across as egotistical. But it didn’t because, even though there was quite a bit of I and me, she consistently shared her insights from her experiences, good and bad. Share your insights so  your reader can get more value than voyeuristic entertainment.

Pitfall #2 Painting yourself as a victim. 🡪 You have agency. That doesn’t mean you were never victimized. It doesn’t mean you can’t talk about being a survivor.

But even as a child you took action, maybe it didn’t get the results you wanted, but you made choices, and certainly as an adult you do. Even if you couldn’t control what happened to you or around you, you chose how you wanted to respond. Show us that you’re a person who chose her response and lived with the consequences of those choices.

Pitfall #3 Revenge writing 🡪 If your find yourself writing your story from a place of bitterness, anger, or vengefulness, take a step back. Sometimes, you’re still so caught up in the emotions of the moment that you can’t give us any insight.

Get to the other side of the issue before you write about it. That doesn’t mean you have to be “over it” so to speak. But you have to be able to write about it from a place that allows you to share your lessons from that experience.

Pitfall #4 Thinking small. 🡪 Connect to bigger issues. Connect to historical events. Your story did not happen in a vacuum, even if it felt like it did. One of my coaching clients starts her book with the moment she became a teenage mother. She connected that pivotal experience to the larger cultural issue with an explosion in teenage pregnancies during that time. It gave her story more gravitas and relevance and allowed her to talk about bigger issues.

Pitfall #5 Starting from the beginning 🡪 Start with a moment that matters.

You never ever ever need to start your story with the moment you were born—unless that was a pivotal event. So if you sustained an injury at birth or sadly lost your mother in the process, then it might be relevant to share the moment you were born. Otherwise, start with a moment that matters, a defining moment in your life. You can move your reader backward or forward in time after that, but give us a moment that matters so you can draw us in.

Pitfall #6 Using a microscopic pov for the whole book. 🡪 Pull back and show us the world in which it all happened. Most people write their story from the point of view of a microscope. It’s all about what happened within their reach. 

But to put us in the moment, you may have to give us a better sense of time and place. Pull back and set the scene. Give us the view from a telescope. Show us your home, but also show us your neighborhood. Show us your classroom and the larger school or community. Show us your Sunday School class but also show us the larger church. Give us that context.

Pitfall #8 Leaving us in darkness 🡪 My husband calls me the Queen of Darkness. I love a dark movie or a dark book. I love dark TV shows, like Westworld and The Americans. I  even write dark fiction under a pen name. I can be drawn into your dark story, if that’s the truth of it. But as a reader, I also want hope. Most readers do.

Your story hasn’t ended in tragedy because you’re still here and in a position to write your memoir. You get to choose where to end your memoir. Choose to end it in a place that leaves your reader with hope.

That’s all for now. You can find the resources mentioned in this episode in the show notes at CandiceLDavis.com/17. (That’s the numeral 17, not spelled out.)

If you enjoyed this episode, I’d really appreciate a great review wherever you listen to podcasts. Reviews help more listeners find the show. It really makes a big difference to me, and I appreciate every review.

Thanks for listening to Nothing but the Words. I’m your author coach, Candice L Davis. And I’ll see you next time.